Posted 6 years ago on Aug. 30, 2012, 12:42 p.m. EST by nazihunter
This content is user submitted and not an official statement
Give the number of distortions and lies from the RNC, I thought I'd write a speech for the next republican speaker:
This morning I got up and built myself a textile mill and then I built a mill and invented new dyes. Then I created all the machinery I needed to spin new material. I had to do it the raw because I do everything myself. I spun some new lies, er, I mean yarns, and made a shirt, and underwear, and pants and socks. I realized I needed shoes, so I quickly built a rubber factory and leather processing plant all by myself. I made myself a pair of shoes. But before I did all that, I needed a car. I had to build a rubber plant and make tires, and a steel mill and I drilled for my own oil and processed it into gasoline and forged my own tools and assembly line and then built my own automobile. But before I did that, I needed roads to drive on. I built my own tar and concrete processing plants and built roads to drive on. But who could do all that without a cup of coffee. I had to build my own plane, fly to Columbia, plant and process my own coffee beans. Then I flew home and dug my own well until I hit water and built my own coffee maker after building my own plastics molding plant and electronics wiring plant. I did all this by 6am because I had to build my own business.
I am SUPER REPUBLI-CAN! Or maybe not. But, if you wanna take things out of context, and you're republican, just go all the way. Why not? I'm sure there's some idiot who'd buy it