Forum Post: The Forest for the Trees: Stockholm Syndrome as we Re-Frame Societal Abuse in America and Beyond.

I reposted my earlier comment as a post because so often we seem to ask why. We can't see the forest through the trees. And I think it is important we clear the fog:

We are worth so much more. The answer to me is quite clear: Corporations and the narcissists running them have employed the psychology of gaslighting. For anyone who grew up with narcissistic parents...it is the exact same dynamic. When you begin to realize the relationship of codependency and narcissism it is being done on a mass scale.

Employers and corporations have become quite like an abusive husband or parent. A lot of forced dependency coupled with a slow degredation of self worth...we have been taught to (latest buzzword) "reframe" the abuse. As well as adapt to a new albeit unhealthy "normal". We are taught we are responsible for how others treat us...that their behaviours are justified by our own failure and helplessness to change it. Instead of calling them out we work harder to prove our worth...which does NOT ever work.The helpless feeling feeds the worthless feeling which feeds the abuse cycle. To an extent yes we are responsible for what we accept...but NOT for the abuse - abuse is never justified or our fault...it is merely our responsibility to end the abuse and not allow it to continue. But it isn't our job to change the abuser or to somehow change his mindset...it is only our job to call out abuse and call it what it is. The idea of "reframing" abuse and taking it on as our responsibility to adapt to it...is an extremely dangerous idea. One used in many cults, and other abusive dynamics and the foundation for Stockholm Syndrome.

Corporations coupled with government are abusing and taking advantage of the populous and what do we do? We work harder to prove our worth. This isnt working for us...they get our best and we get more abuse. It is our job to call it out and end it. We will never change the abuser or his mindset. We need to change what we are willing to allow. The first step is to realize this IS abuse.

And to all those "tough" guys who voted for Trump. I hate to be the one to tell you...you have stepped into the role of an abused wife. Somehow believing your abuser is doing his best to take care of you...while he quietly and invisibly pulls the rug out from under your feet so you fall down and he can PRETEND to rescue you. It is quite difficult conundrum for how do you end abuse when you are reliant on your abuser...when you have no place else to work and you need him to put money in your bank account and feed you. Thus the dilemma.

Sometimes he will let you succeed for a bit lulling you into a false sense of security before the next sabotage because rest assured the illusion of progress is his best weapon which allows him to distract and covertly destroy you. (He will convince you that you somehow induced the sabotage, and next time if you work harder to bend yourself into a better pretzel, you can possibly avoid it). He does not want you to and will never actually create conditions for you to succeed... because then you can escape. His grandeur and power is built and reliant on the mouse in his cage.